You called earlier and I chose not to answer. It’s really hard but I needed to do that for myself. I need to move forward. By answering your call will pull me back to where I started. I’m sorry. Everyday has been a constant struggle for me. Little by little I tried to carry on with my life, a life without you. It’s really really hard, trust me. But I have no choice. You’ve let me go. You’re already happy with someone new.

So I went to bed early. Around 10 in the evening, a series of phone calls and text messages woke me up. It was you, asking for help. To be honest, I wanted to answer your calls and texts immediately but I knew by doing so will just drag me down. But my conscience, strong feelings and love for you prevailed. It was hard not to care for you. So I answered your 7th call. You were stranded somewhere a bit far from your place. I got up and got dressed so that I can check the status outside. Saw that it’s bumper to bumper and it’s useless to drive my car to fetch you. I chose to walk to fetch you but thank goodness you already found a ride to your place a few minutes after. So I went back and waited for you to get home. When you told me you got home safely, I felt so relieved.

By answering your distress call, would I consider myself back to where I started? Am I still stranded in misery? Stuck? To be honest, I don’t think so. I know I’m strong enough to accept the fact that you’re already happy with him and I need to be happy for myself as well. As I’ve said before, your happiness is my happiness. I love myself more now and I won’t let anything get in the way of finding and reaching my happiness. I can still love you from afar right? Because I really love you, I still do.

So I am ending this with 2 questions: Where was he when you needed him the most? Is he willing to go out of his way just to help you? Think about it.

1 Notes

Life is all about choices. Every situation is a choice. You choose how you react in situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. It’s either you choose to be in a good mood or bad. It’s your choice how you live your life. Don’t let change overwhelm you. Let change help you find opportunities you may never have known. Growing older is mandatory, but growing up is optional.

1 Notes

Spent my Friday night with Jen and Reg at Eastwood. Dinner was on Reg because she got sort of a promotion so congrats to her. Since Serenitea Eastwood’s open already, we’ve had our dose of milk tea while catching up. Jen’s treat. Talk about a night without spending a single centavo, well, except for parking of course. Awesome! I just have to prepare for our next hangout coz everything’s on me! Oh well.

I’m happy I was able to spend time with my girls. It’s been months since we last went out. Reg’s been busy with her weekly family out of town trips while Jen’s spending a lot of time managing their family business. Also, I’ve been a workaholic these past weeks. Almost all of my teammates went to China for training but since I declined, I have to cover for the entire team. Working almost 24 hours a day and then visiting our sites in Visayas and Mindanao is very stressful but I’m enjoying every minute of it. Learning a lot of things, exploring different places, meeting new people. We have to love our work right?

Unfortunately, I’m no Superman. I’ve been under the weather for a week now. Screw you sore throat and colds. I still have a lot of things to do today. Venue reservation for lil sis’ debut, gym, The Script Concert with Toi, Darwin, Em and Jan, then night work in Pioneer. I know I can accomplish everything today. Aja!

4 Notes

After evaluating the first two weeks of 2011, I was able to come up with a list of things that I want to accomplish this year:

1. Free from Credit Card debts.
2. Read at least 3 non-technical books.
3. Update CV then try to enroll for MBA or Cisco.
4. Sleep in my own room.
5. Go back to 120lbs and maintain it.
6. Maroon 5 Concert date in May.
7. Organize little sister’s debut in July.
8. Travel abroad.
9. Buy a new phone.
10. Save more, shop less, don’t swipe.

As far as I know, the things listed above are realistic and attainable. To be honest, I’m giving myself only 8 months to accomplish everything. I think it’s enough time for me to be able to cross them all out. I just hope that I can overcome the hurdles along the way. Good luck to me. I can do this. Aja!

Date more, fall in love with one

12 Notes

Be really attractive. Your acne is gone, your face has matured without having wrinkles and everything on your body is lifted naturally. Eat bagels seven days a week, binge-drink and do drugs: you’ll still look like a babe. When you turn thirty, it’ll become a different story but that’s, like, not for a really long time.

Date people who you know you’ll never be able to love. See someone for three months for no other reason than because it’s winter and you want to keep warm by holding another body. Date a Republican just so you can say you dated a Republican.

Eventually all these nobodies will make you crave a somebody. Have a real relationship with someone. Go on vacations together, exchange house keys, cry in their arms after a demoralizing day at work. Think about marrying them and maybe even get engaged. Regardless of the outcome, feel proud of yourself for being able to love someone in a healthy way.

Start your twenties with a lot of friends and leave with a few good ones. What happened? People faded away into their careers and relationships. Fights were had and never resolved. Shit happens.

Think about having children when you stop acting like a child. This may not ever happen.

Maybe this is assuming too much. Maybe this is generalizing. Maybe society uses age as an unrealistic marker for growth. Maybe. Still feel the anxiety on your 30th birthday and think to yourself, “Oh shit, I’m no longer a 20-something.”

Excerpts from How to be 20-Something by Ryan O’Connell

3 Notes

Thursday

    

• Training with fellow management trainees.
• Watched Going the Distance with Jen, Ron and Ton at Greenbelt.
• Wingman’s Apocalyptic Buffalo Wings at The Collective.
• Almost got lost in Makati on my way home.

Friday

   

• Spontaneous Tagaytay trip with High School Barkada.
• Dinner at Leslie’s to celebrate Elaine’s birthday.
• Bought Rowena’s Blueberry Cheese Tarts for you.

Saturday

     

• Lunch at Tender Bobs Greenhills.
• Despicable Me at Rockwell.
• Pepper Lunch for Dinner.
• Another super fun Saturday. Thank you! :)

Sunday

      

• Boys’ night out for the UAAP CDC Tickets with Toi and Darwin.
• 3 Laptops died around 5am.
• Hot Choco and donuts for breakfast c/o Mela.
• Rice in a Box lunch c/o Em.
• Congrats to the winners: UST + FEU = UP.
• UST had the Attitude, FEU got the WOW factor, UP was consistent.
• Kudos to DLSU for the big improvement! \m/
• Behind the scenes: UP cheered for UST and vice versa.
• Early dinner at Nomnomnom. Malinomnom Pizza. Yummmm!

It was my first time to watch the UAAP Cheerdance Competition and fall in line for UAAP tickets, but it was all worth it. 12 hours!  I’m super happy I have friends like you. We bonded at our best, and most importantly, we stuck together at our worst! No sleep, no shower, super cranky, too tired to function. We definitely survived our toughest challenge to date as friends. We were able to overcome such a gruesome experience. I hope this won’t happen again, but if it does, I’m more than willing to share it with you guys. Cheers to us Darwin, Em, Mela and Toi!

Excerpts from Emoisms: Longest Weekend Ever!